Lesson Three - Judy C.

Out with The Committee!

I can hear them now. “Me, me, me, don’t forget meeeee!”

And I didn’t even know they were there!

I thought it was me, not them.

So, Mother, I don’t need to please you first any more. You were always so disapproving, but that was your problem, not mine. I can see that now. Rest now. Your time is gone.

Quilt Police. I can’t put a name or a face to any of you, but you have been so CRITICAL! Quarter inch seams, points matching perfectly, correct colour schemes (who thought that one up?), hangings that lie square and flat, the list goes on and on. I don’t need your petty rules.  They restrict me. I’ll do things My Way, right? Out You Go!

B.  Yes, you with the holier than thou expression. You were always there with that look, and the sweetly insincere word. Were you jealous? If so, that was your problem, not mine. Shut up, B. Bye! B!

I’m not C, or P, or even SD. So I don’t need to.......... what’s the expression I need...........live up to you?    Be“as good as you”? Be compared to you?

You are Different. That’s all. Chalk and cheese. Why do I want to be cheese? I feel a giggle coming on.

Hey, this is FUN!

Therapeutic!

Liberating!

I’m chuckling. Now, who else is lurking in there?

Look out, “friends”. You are defunct. Dismantled. Dead.

So is that it? Was The Committee so small after all?

Have I been dumb enough to worry about what The Committee would say all this time?

I never thought of my self doubts as a Committee. Doubts were just random bits of self criticism. Negative all the time, instead of being helpful and positive. I don’t think I often related doubts to people, but now, well, this exercise explains it all.

Hey, I can laugh at them all now!

I want to make something to commemorate this turning point. Not something to burn. Something that will grow, change, develop. An outdoor sculpture, perhaps. No, not perhaps, definitely.

The ghosts have gone! Whoopeeeee!